At what point does the community stop making excuses for the parent and start advocating for the kid first? I am sure parenting is damn hard. I won't pretend to know. But I do know that a child is supposed to be the priority of the parent, but yet that seems to be a rarity for myself and SO many other kids past/present.
I feel my tiny face pressed up against the apt window at age 5 bawling as my mom went out to party with friends, deeply terrified she was never coming back. Always wondering why dad always cancels visits at the last minute due to some lame excuse, and refuses to pay child support because he has payments to make on his new convertible and house. I look into the mirror and look directly into the eyes of the child wondering why they are alone late at night to watch over their siblings, trying to pass the vacant time with whatever's handy. I hear the child asking where mommy is and when will she be back, not sure whether her words or her tone or her eyes carry the heavier ache. I feel the cold skin of the child locked outside in the snow while the adults argue inside, or run errands to the store and simply leave said-child behind to carve caves in the snow banks. I hear the foot kick down the door in a drug-induced power-trip, feel the hand grab the limbs in emotional-rage, hear the screaming of the alcoholic debate into the wee hours of the morn, cry beside the child who lost their parent to an overdose, and see those kids wake the next day and pretend to be normal, pretend to be happy, pretend to understand, pretend not to be disappointed, pretend to be a kid.
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